Chimera Song Mosaic
Thursday, January 26, 2006
Today I am a truth-teller, and the truth I am telling is about the rampant unscrupulous breeding of ferrets. Ferrets so interrelated that they have reduced lifespan of about half, ferrets so susceptible to adrenal disease that they almost assuredly get it. Watch out where you get your ferret; stay away from pet store ferrets since they probably come from Marshall's ferrets, the ones with the most genetic problems and whose popular line of ferret meal is way too high in sugars and whose owners are seduced by name recognition (sort of like the problem we'd have if Schwarzenegger ran for president in 2008).

The three main factors typically resulting in adrenal disease (read: cancer) are 1. diet (diet should be low in sugars); 2. Overexpose to light (keep your ferrets away from full-spectrum light and encourage burrowing in dark places, which ferrets enjoy); 3. get your ferret from a reputable breeder, not a pet store. Even better, contact a ferret rescue operation.

I don't think reputable breeders are even safe. Even though breeders may control for some disease, they don't know what other diseases they might be propagating since they aren't geneticists. Even geneticists don't know what all they are dealing with. Perhaps only geneticists should be able to legally breed any kind of animal. But then again maybe we'd be safer with backyard breeders since they at least aren't targeting one particular trait and ignoring others. Being largely noninformed, they might have the best likelihood of creating a healthy animal. Perhaps accidental breedings are the best bet, and I don't mean those hot commodities right now the likes of Puggles. Yes, and on the other hand, geneticists bring us chickens with extremely large breasts and wings that look the size of turkeys' and taste terrible. Perhaps only ethical geneticists should be allowed to breed, but then who would sign their paychecks? Furthermore, how would breeding be regulated and controlled? Since animals are apparently "property," who has the right to tell an individual what to do with his or her property?

The commercial aspect must be removed from the equation. Probably the best thing to do is, if you want a surrogate baby, a cute and fuzzy puppy or kitten, go to the local animal shelter. And please spay and neuter.

I have no poetry ideas today (perhaps this will be my perpetual song), but Jonathan tells truth about translation, and I am in agreement.

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